And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
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she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
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He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
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