I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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