My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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