accomplished twins. life is a go
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
