Capitaan dildo arrescate!
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
