We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
