I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
