You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
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