I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize