Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I can text with my tongue
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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