I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize