did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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