??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
God I need to hump something, right now.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
