it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
