She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
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