my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
We are all done wearing pants today
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
