My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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