Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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