If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
mondays should just be called national damage control day
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
