I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
