I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
do nipples grow back?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
