I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
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Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
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