I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I'm like, not good at living.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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