I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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