Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
