whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
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