I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
