I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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