what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Randomize
