At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
