I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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