i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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