I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
