Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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