Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
