Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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