omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Randomize