Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
