office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
