it wasn't lemon gatorade
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
