I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
