I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize
