We're like a lot better than the average bears
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
