I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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