I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
This gyro tastes like lonliness
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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