Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
