He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
