Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
