Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Just took my morning after pill in the library
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
