I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
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