Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
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