1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
this will be a night to untag.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Randomize
